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<title>Of Chickens and Maybe Two Goats by onionrings_andhoneymustard</title>
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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23267359">Of Chickens and Maybe Two Goats</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/onionrings_andhoneymustard/pseuds/onionrings_andhoneymustard'>onionrings_andhoneymustard</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Iron Man (Movies), Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - No Powers, M/M</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-03-22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-03-22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-01 07:09:20</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>782</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23267359</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/onionrings_andhoneymustard/pseuds/onionrings_andhoneymustard</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>“Peter,” Tony begins.  His tone is the forced sort of casual he uses when confronted with a situation he can’t quite make sense of, and that he suspects Peter had something to do with.  He uses it a lot.  “Why do we have chickens in our yard?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>Tom Holland posted an Instagram story about having chickens for eggs.  My friend said, "How come I can see Tony Stark being like, 'Why do we have chickens in our yard?  You bought chickens?'"  And thus this fic was born.  And like an unruly toddler, then it got away from me.</em>
</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Peter Parker &amp; Tony Stark, Peter Parker/Tony Stark</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>118</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Of Chickens and Maybe Two Goats</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Peter,” Tony begins.  His tone is the forced sort of casual he uses when confronted with a situation he can’t quite make sense of, and that he suspects Peter had something to do with.  He uses it a lot.</p>
<p>Peter looks up, his teaspoon of brown sugar hovering in the air above his coffee cup.  Tony’s back is to him, sunlight streaming in through the window above the sink and causing a sort of golden halo around Tony’s head.  <em>Saint Anthony</em>, Peter thinks to himself, smiling a little.  Tony would roll his eyes and huff if Peter said it outloud; he always does.  Despite evidence to the contrary, Tony is adamant that he’s <em>not saintly, Peter</em>.</p>
<p>“Yeah?” Peter says finally, tipping the spoon so the brown sugar falls into the mug.  Tony’s looking out into the backyard.  The backyard of the house they purchased in upstate New York last fall.  The backyard of<em> their house</em>, Peter thinks to himself with a bubbling sort of excitement that shows no signs of fading, no matter how many times he repeats the words.</p>
<p>“Why do we have chickens in our yard?”</p>
<p>Peter blushes faintly.  He’d known it wouldn’t take long for Tony to notice the coop and the fence and the three brown chickens scratching at the dirt.  He’d just thought it would take longer than eighteen hours, that’s all.  “I bought them,” he says, measuring cream into his mug before finally pouring in the coffee.</p>
<p>“You bought chickens,” Tony echoes flatly, turning around so he can look at Peter.  He leans back against the counter, crossing one foot in front of the other.</p>
<p>“Mmhmm.”  Peter is pointedly not looking at him, stirring everything together for far longer than is strictly necessary - Tony would know, Tony has perfected the art of making Peter’s coffee.</p>
<p>“Tell me, Peter: <em>Why</em>, exactly, did you buy chickens?”</p>
<p>One of Peter’s shoulders raises in a shrug as he takes a long swallow from his mug.  There’s no reason for him to feel shy or embarrassed—Tony probably just forgot about his promise; it’s not a big deal, Tony has a million different things demanding his attention at any given moment—but he does.</p>
<p>Tony’s eyes narrow slightly.  “Peter.”</p>
<p>Peter rubs the back of his neck.  “I just … We need eggs?” he offers.  “We eat eggs.  And this way, we can have eggs.”</p>
<p>“They have eggs at the store,” Tony returns.</p>
<p>“Yes, but…” Peter trails off.</p>
<p>Tony’s eyebrow arches.  “JARVIS, schedule an appointment to go look at a farm so we can give these animals a proper home.”</p>
<p>“JARVIS, don’t,” Peter snaps before the A.I. can even acknowledge the request.  To Tony he says, “I can’t believe you would use JARVIS against me.”</p>
<p>“I can’t believe you would continue to avoid the question.  Why the chickens, Peter?”</p>
<p>Peter looks down at his mug; it’s almost empty.  “When we moved in, we talked about how exciting it would be once winter ended.  In the city it’s…” he waves his hand in the air vaguely.  “Well, out here we get to watch the snow melt into the earth and the flowers start to bloom.  And the day we signed the papers, you said, ‘On the first day of spring, let’s get a rooster <em>and some chickens </em>to celebrate because chicks are the real symbol of spring and new beginnings.  Just like this house, for us.’  It was <em>so cheesy</em> but also so romantic.”  Peter sighs happily at the memory.</p>
<p>Tony remembers that conversation; he can’t believe he’d forgotten about the chickens.  He had been going to suggest they also get a lop-eared rabbit, until he remembered Peter recounting the story of how he had been bitten by one when he was seven.  On that day, apparently, Peter had sworn off purposely interacting with a rabbit ever again.  So, no rabbits.</p>
<p>“Spring started just the other day,” Peter continues, draining the rest of his coffee and setting the mug down on the counter, “You didn’t even mention it so I thought maybe you forgot, but I didn’t and I was so excited, and I thought it would be okay if I just went ahead and … got them.  But I couldn’t find a rooster,” he adds ruefully.</p>
<p>Tony bites down his quip of,<em> There’s a cock in my pants.</em> and says, “I’d rather have a goat.  Instead of a rooster, I mean.”</p>
<p>It takes Peter a second.  “You’re not going to make JARVIS find a farm after all?”</p>
<p>“No.”  Tony pushes off the counter and makes his way over to Peter.  He presses a kiss to Peter’s lips, pulling back with a furrowed brow and tilts his head to the side.  “Maybe two goats.”</p>
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